Today I Choose to be Glowing – How to be Glowing

I’ll never forget the time someone told me I was glowing — and it wasn’t on my wedding day. It wasn’t after a vacation, a promotion, or any of those traditional glow-inducing moments. It was on a random Tuesday at the grocery store, three weeks into Curtis’s recovery from surgery, when I felt anything but radiant. I was running on coffee and determination, my hair was in yesterday’s ponytail, and I’m pretty sure I had paint under my fingernails from a late-night art session that had become my therapy.

The woman in the checkout line looked at me with genuine curiosity and said, “You’re glowing. What’s your secret?” I almost laughed. Secret? The secret was that I’d finally stopped trying to glow and started living authentically. The secret was that this inner light I’d been chasing externally had been there all along, waiting for me to get out of my own way and let it shine.

That interaction made me realize something profound: the glow we spend thousands of dollars and countless hours trying to achieve through skincare routines, supplements, and procedures isn’t really about our skin at all. It’s about alignment. It’s about living so truthfully, so fully, that your essence literally radiates from the inside out. And apparently, even exhausted and disheveled, authenticity has its own luminescence.

The Glow That Can’t Be Bottled

For years, I chased the external markers of radiance. The right moisturizer, the perfect lighting, the angles that minimized my flaws and maximized my assets. I studied the faces of women who seemed to glow effortlessly, trying to decode their secret. Better genes? More expensive products? Professional photography? I was missing the point entirely.

The glow I was seeing in those women — and that others were apparently seeing in me that Tuesday at Publix — wasn’t coming from their skin. It was coming from something much deeper. It was the light of someone living aligned with their purpose, at peace with their choices, present in their own life instead of performing for others.

During Curtis’s health crisis, I had no bandwidth for pretense. No energy for maintaining the polished exterior I’d cultivated for decades. I was too focused on what actually mattered — his recovery, our family, the preciousness of each ordinary day — to worry about whether my mascara was smudged or my outfit coordinated. And somehow, in letting go of trying to look good, I started actually looking good. Or at least, according to strangers in grocery stores, I was glowing.

The Inner Light Discovery

The real awakening came during those long nights when Curtis was sleeping fitfully and I’d find myself painting in the living room at 2 AM. There’s something about creating in the quiet hours that strips away all pretense. No one’s watching, no one’s judging, there’s no performance required. Just you, your truth, and whatever wants to emerge on the canvas.

I started noticing a warmth in my chest during these sessions — not the anxious heat of stress or the flush of embarrassment, but something steadier, more grounded. It was like a pilot light that had been burning quietly for years but was finally getting enough oxygen to flame brighter. This wasn’t excitement or adrenaline; it was something deeper. It was the feeling of being fully alive, fully present, fully myself.

One morning, catching my reflection after one of these late-night creative sessions, I saw what that woman in the store had seen. My skin looked different — not younger or more perfect, but somehow lit from within. My eyes were clearer, more present. There was a softness around my face that no amount of expensive cream had ever achieved. This was what authentic living looked like on a human face.

Physical Sensations of Inner Radiance

The physical experience of this inner glow is surprisingly tangible. When I’m living authentically — whether that’s writing a difficult truth, having a real conversation, or losing myself in a painting — I feel warmth in my core. Not the surface heat of exercise or hot flashes (though Lord knows I have plenty of those), but a deeper warmth that seems to emanate from my solar plexus and spread outward.

My breathing changes too. Instead of the shallow, quick breaths of anxiety or performance, my breathing deepens and slows. My shoulders drop. The chronic tension I carry in my jaw releases. It’s as if my body recognizes when I’m being real and rewards me with relaxation, with a settling into myself that’s immediately visible to others.

There’s also a quality of presence that comes with this inner light. When I’m glowing from authenticity rather than trying to glow through effort, I’m more here, more available to the moment and the people in it. My attention isn’t scattered among all the ways I might be failing or falling short. It’s gathered into this moment, this conversation, this experience of being fully alive.

Authenticity as Skincare

I’ve started thinking about authenticity as the ultimate skincare routine. When you’re not constantly wearing masks — literal or metaphorical — your skin can breathe. When you’re not chronically stressed about maintaining a false image, the tension lines around your eyes soften. When you’re living aligned with your values instead of fighting against your nature, that struggle doesn’t show up in your face.

During Curtis’s recovery, I noticed this phenomenon accelerate. Despite the stress, the sleepless nights, the emotional rollercoaster of medical uncertainty, people kept commenting on how good I looked. I wasn’t doing anything different externally — if anything, I was doing less. No fancy skincare routines, minimal makeup, whatever clothes were clean and comfortable.

But internally, I was more myself than I’d been in years. There was no energy available for pretense, no bandwidth for performing. I was just me, dealing with our reality, doing what needed to be done with as much grace and love as I could muster. Apparently, that version of me glowed brighter than any highlighter or bronzer I’d ever tried.

The Glow of Creative Flow

The most consistent access to this inner radiance comes through creative expression. When I’m painting, writing, or working on Enlightenzz, something in me lights up that’s visible to others. Curtis will often comment that I look different when I emerge from a creative session — more animated, more present, somehow more vividly myself.

There’s a particular sensation that comes with creative flow that I’ve learned to recognize as glow-inducing. It’s a feeling of expansion in my chest, like my ribcage is opening to make room for something larger than myself. My hands feel more alive, more sensitive. My vision seems sharper, colors more vibrant. I’m plugged into some essential current that makes everything more vivid, more possible.

The aftermath of these creative sessions is where the glow really shows up. There’s a satisfaction that comes from having expressed something true, something uniquely mine, that settles into my features like contentment. It’s not the temporary high of external validation, but the deeper glow of self-expression, of honoring whatever wants to emerge through me.

Aging and the Inner Light

Here’s something nobody tells you about aging and beauty: the glow actually gets more accessible as you get older, not less. When you’re young, you waste so much energy trying to be what others want you to be. When you’re past 50, there’s less bandwidth for that nonsense. You either learn to be yourself or you exhaust yourself maintaining a performance that becomes harder to sustain with each passing year.

The lines on my face tell stories now — laugh lines from joy that felt too big for my body, worry lines from love that ran deeper than I knew was possible, concentration lines from years of focusing on what mattered. These aren’t flaws to be erased; they’re evidence of a life fully lived. And somehow, paradoxically, accepting them has made me more radiant, not less.

There’s also something to be said for the freedom that comes with age. I care less about looking perfect and more about feeling alive. I’m more interested in experiences that light me up from within than in products that promise to light me up from without. This shift in focus from external to internal transformation creates its own luminescence.

The Glow of Service and Purpose

Another source of this inner radiance is alignment with purpose. When I’m working on something that matters — writing about real experiences, helping other women navigate their own transformations, contributing to conversations that need to happen — I feel that pilot light flare brighter. There’s an energy that comes with meaningful work that’s completely different from the energy of obligation or duty.

During Curtis’s illness, caring for him gave me access to this purposeful glow. Not because caregiving is inherently noble (though it can be), but because it was so clearly what love looked like in that moment. There was no question about whether I was doing the right thing, being the right person, making the right choice. The clarity of purpose created its own illumination.

This is different from the glow of achievement or recognition. It’s quieter, steadier, more sustainable. It doesn’t depend on external validation or perfect outcomes. It comes from the simple act of showing up authentically for what matters most, whether anyone notices or not.

Cultivating Your Own Inner Light

Pay Attention to What Lights You Up

Notice when you feel most alive, most yourself, most connected to something larger. These aren’t random moments — they’re clues to what makes your inner light shine brighter. For me, it’s creative expression, deep conversations, and acts of service. Your combination might be completely different.

Create Space for Authenticity

The glow of authenticity needs space to breathe. This might mean saying no to situations that require excessive performance, spending time alone to reconnect with yourself, or finding communities where you can be real rather than perfect.

Practice Presence

Inner radiance is closely connected to presence. When you’re fully here, fully engaged with the moment, that availability itself creates a kind of glow. Practice bringing your full attention to conversations, experiences, and daily activities rather than letting your mind scatter among past regrets and future worries.

Honor Your Creative Expression

Whatever your creative outlet — painting, writing, gardening, cooking, singing in the car — give it space and attention. Creative expression is a direct path to inner illumination, a way of letting your essential self shine through into the world.

The Ripple Effect of Inner Radiance

The beautiful thing about authentic glow is that it’s contagious. When you’re lit up from within, it gives others permission to access their own inner light. When you’re present and real, it invites others into presence and authenticity. When you’re aligned with your purpose, it reminds others that they have purposes worth pursuing too.

That interaction in the grocery store wasn’t just about someone noticing my glow — it was about that recognition creating a moment of connection, of possibility. Her observation reminded me to pay attention to what was happening inside me, to value the inner work that was apparently showing up outwardly.

Now I find myself looking for that glow in others, recognizing it when someone is speaking their truth, following their calling, living authentically despite the cultural pressure to perform. It’s like a secret language of the soul, this recognition of inner light in each other.

Maintaining the Glow Through Difficult Seasons

The real test of inner radiance comes during challenging times. It’s easy to glow when everything’s going well; the question is whether that light can persist through difficulty. What I learned during Curtis’s health crisis is that the glow might dim sometimes, but it doesn’t disappear. It just goes deeper, becomes more essential, burns at a steadier frequency.

During the hardest days, when fear and exhaustion threatened to overwhelm everything, I found that small acts of authenticity kept the pilot light burning. Writing one true sentence. Painting one honest stroke. Having one real conversation. These weren’t grand gestures, but they were genuine, and genuineness always glows.

The key was not judging the dimmer days, not demanding that I radiate consistently like some sort of human light bulb. Inner glow, like all natural phenomena, has seasons. Sometimes it’s a bonfire, sometimes it’s candlelight, but as long as you keep feeding it with authenticity and purpose, it never goes completely out.

The Ongoing Practice of Radiance

Today I choose to be glowing not because I’ve mastered some secret of eternal radiance, but because I’ve learned that the light was there all along, waiting for me to stop trying so hard and start being so real. The glow that stranger noticed in the grocery store wasn’t something I had achieved; it was something I had finally allowed.

Some days I remember to tend this inner light with creative expression, authentic communication, and purposeful action. Other days I get caught up in the external world of obligations and expectations. But the light is always there, ready to brighten the moment I return to authenticity, the moment I choose being real over looking perfect.

The most beautiful discovery is that this glow improves with age, deepens with experience, becomes more accessible as we learn to value inner substance over outer performance. The light that emerges from living truthfully at 61 has qualities that no 25-year-old glow could possess — depth, wisdom, hard-earned peace, the luminescence that comes from having weathered storms and chosen love anyway.

That woman in the checkout line gave me a gift that day, reflecting back something I hadn’t even realized I was emanating. Now I try to be that mirror for others, recognizing and honoring the glow that comes from authentic living. We’re all capable of this inner radiance; we just need to stop trying to create it externally and start cultivating it from within.